Dear Ernie,

Hang overs they last too long. Come downs they last too long. I never learn the simple things - you must eat. You will feel like this again.
New years eve, always a day of disappointment...is this a given? No I refuse to believe it, I refuse, but so far I am proven wrong. Curious I watch the days. Its unhealthy to eat alone.

So we have a meeting today, me and Finnigan and the man who will soon put the hat on our songs and clothe them. We drink half pints of Bitter in the Owl and Pussycat, he hears triggers and layers. Never remove childish enthusiasm. Always intrude on childish enthusiasm.

I am starting to feel human again, almost there, if I can just run the last few yards. Stuck in those days when the world feels owl-shaped, a life you don't even have is hovering and you float inside it. Shaking.

He has a face of his son- it is strange to see; you know it but its not what you know. Life, but not as we know it (oh dear).

Don't rest Ern, don't rest, we may still get there.